These are a few of the phrases that have poured around me from 1000’s of women. Six, seven and eight figure professionals who privately identify as a successful mess. Though they’ve said it through parsed lips, while cracking a smile and squinting as if they thought that would dim the shadow of pain that straddled their contorted faces, I knew there was more than a hint of truth to these comments.
What these high achieving women who seemingly have it all, the career and cash cushions to boot-were weighed down with had plagued me for years. Constantly finding myself in what I thought would be authentic and refreshing professional relationships that would organically develop into personal pseudo friendships where I felt smothered, drained, and exhausted from the constant subliminal verbal cuts and backhanded compliments, I could relate to them. Women rule the world but we can also destroy it and everyone associated if we allow ourselves to fall into isolated pits of envy, competition, comparison and self-fulfilling limitations that are carved on a stone of victimization.
I’d had enough. Self-checks followed self-reflection and healthy relationships were formed. But it started with a pause. In the midst of being still and allowing myself to take time out for me, I was able to finally admit to the reality. What other people thought having it all looked like (houses, cars, kids, an incredible supportive husband, dogs, cats and vacations) wasn’t enough for me. I wasn’t ungrateful, in fact I was so thankful that I felt guilty for wanting more. But the pause allowed me to get real with myself and stake claim on the fact that I don’t have to apologize for it. Neither do you!
In the midnight hour, following my own moment of solitude I received the greatest gift I never imagined. Permission to Pause (PIIP) was conceived and has hit the east coast with an unstoppable force. I get so many emails, calls, text and reminders about how incredible women have felt during and after the event that it was overwhelming. What began as a small cohort of women over a few sparsely advertised events has turned into a movement.
Formerly deemed Permission to Pause NOW- the game changing event is simply referred to as PIIP Community, because that’s what it is, a community of professional women who support each other. No posting, no posing, no pitching themselves against one another to compare who wore the highest high heel.
PIIP Community is a quarterly event offered to professional women who want time to switch off from their busy lives, relate to themselves by embracing their inner superwoman and relate to other powerful professional women who desire to build a social culture of trust. Building a network is important because it allows you space to breathe. Without it, you risk stifling your creativity and love for the people you haven’t been honest with, mainly YOU